Well it was only a matter of time. I will freely admit I've never read any Chick Lit. I do know what it is! Anything that deals with the issues of modern womanhood, which I regard myself as still being part of, in a frequently humorous and lighthearted fashion, I should perhaps have made time for. After all I thoroughly enjoyed the film version of Bridget Jones's diary. It was hilarious. What's more the author Helen Fielding is an English graduate from Oxford. So that must surely mean decent writing!
However it's all quite irrelevant. Been overtaken by events. Because what we now have is Bic Lit, which I'm assuming is more or less the same as Chick Lit only more girly, more relevant to the modern woman, more humorous and more lighthearted, because it's written with those pretty pastel coloured pens. And of course Bic Lit is much better value. Made for the female hand, Bic Lit authors can hold their pens for a greater length of time. Not as exhausting as having to write with those nasty, heavy male pens. Which means that with the added bonus of the smoother writing action of the Bic lit pen, there'll be more words committed to paper, so the books will be longer. Isn't that a lovely!
Bic Lit looks different as well. Gone are the days of boring old black on white. The secret yearning of the 'gentler sex' to use materials that compliment their ultra-femininity has been realised. For the first time ever, Bic Lit authors will be writing on that lovely pink, scented paper. There's a clear strategy at work here. The pens have been specially designed for this application. Just think of it. An aromatic waft with every page turned. Finding Bic Lit in bookshops will be a doddle. All you need do is follow your nose. It is going to revolutionise the reading experience. I wonder how the Kindle will respond to the nasal challenge? After all, these days book and kindle version are part of the regular marketing mix.
What I am looking forward to are the Bic Lit awards or the Bic-er awards. Not sure when the first one will take place or where. Will it be in London? Of course! At The Gherkin.With its uncanny resemblance to the cap shape of the Bic pen, the awards have found their natural home. There'll have to be a bit of rebranding of course. But all The Her-bic would need is a special lighting effect with a sequenced colour change across the entire Bic for Her range, and London will have added an orgasbic visual experience to the city's skyline. Life's a bic really. There's poor old Sir Norman Baron Foster of Bic Bank - sorry Thames Bank - thinking he's designed an iconic architectural form for Londoners, when all the time he's been working for the Bic marketing department.
Presumably the Bic-er awards will get similar tv coverage to the Booker? Who'll be hosting it? Mariella Frostrup perhaps. Don't think it would be up Germaine Greer's street. But you never know. What about Miranda Sawyer? Patsy and Edwina?
As much as I love him, I don't think it could be or should be Stephen Fry.
Hm.
Got it!
What about Ellen Degeneres?
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